Lethargy

Lately I haven't been feeling so well. I just don't do much of anything.

Yes I joined this awesome new gym but I only did it to secure my place. It's been 4 days and I didn't go work out yet. I'm feeling listless and gross. Like I always have trouble sleeping and then I don't want to wake up. I think it's because I have two assignments that I have to hand in but I'm so scared I just don't even want to finish either. I find any excuse to go online and discover anything else rather than focusing on this task.

I hate this me.

I want to be able to wake up refreshed and welcome the day! Not hide under the covers after a bazillion snoozes! I want to take early morning walks and breathe in the dew. I want everything to be alright and I want myself to believe that. I want to fold all the clothes in my dresser and organize my desk. I want to pick cherry blossoms out of a tree (ok that one i just saw in my dream) But most of all I want to be fit and healthy!! These symptoms are obviously coming from someone who isn't taking care of their body. Bottom line...

___________________________________

I NEED TO GO TO THE GYM!!!!!!!!!

Falafel Day

One spring day, my good friend Nina took me to a falafel joint in Paris's 4th arrondissement. Right off Rue de Temple (yeah, that's the Jewish quarter) So anyway, besides the fact that the place was cramped and the waiters were h-o-t, I managed to scarf down an eggplant salad AND a falafel the size of both my hands. Life changing moment.

However, I hadn't tried a falafel sandwich since, fearing that I only liked it at the famed place with a line snaking down the street. So when my roomie walked in today with a bag from Zahrat Lebnan asking, "Who is hungry?" I leapt at the chance to eat cuz I hadn't had anything all day (tsk tsk I know). Lo and behold, she bought falafel. "Too late to change your mind", I thought, "Shouldn't have gotten over-excited." We sat down as we both unraveled the beige paper containing our vegetarian grub. The minute I saw a pickle inside the bread I knew it couldn't be that bad.

It wasn't.

It was delicious. Mouth-watering. Spicy. Tangy. Creamy. Crunchy. Smooth. Good to the last bite.

I thanked her tremendously and confessed to her my former apprehension at the announcement of our lunch. The tabouleh was o.k.

Around 7pm I find myself at the local mall scouring the food court, hoping a Subway would appear. Note to self: Abu Dhabi Mall has the only Subway. Not Khalidiyah. I descend to the Starbucks on the ground floor hoping to get a Venti decaf soy toffee nut latte, cuz afterall, 'tis the season to be jolly. I wanted a sandwich too, but the healthy selection was disappointing. It was a toss up between the wraps: Ceaser Chicken or yup you guessed it Falafel!!

Needless to say I bravely opted for the latter. And it didn't disappoint either.

Ladies and gentlemen, I LOVE Falafel. :)

Hi my name is...

...and I'm the Biggest Loser!!!

I've had my iPod touch for about 2 years now. However, I never really utilized it's full potential up until this week. You see, I bought the entire season 7 of the Biggest Loser off of iTunes and have been watching it...in the gym!!! Yeah, so basically I'm on the treadmill for 1h:23m and by the end of it I'd lose 750 calories without even thinking!! This plan is so awesome, I'd love to see it go wrong! Love to! But it won't inshalla!

Even if their weight loss on the ranch is so grand, I know this is not typical. So I've lost 11 pounds in two weeks and I'm satisfied. I just hope my upcoming trip won't ruin all the work I've done. Let's see of I can resist the Pizzas and Pastas of Italy...

a tout!! xx.

Working out

So it's been 2 days since I renewed my gym membership. I sleep better, I walk taller, but I ache, oh how I ache!! My body hurts all over but I know that this is all part of revving up the engine.

I am still finding ways to sit in front of my computer and type away when really, I should be heading out for another episode of the 'dreadmill'!

I wish for progress. I want to progress. I want to see good results by the end of this week.

I can not afford to slow down, or worse quit. I can not and will not let myself down.

This is a promise.

Now I will kick off my D&G sneakers, put on my Nike shoes, change my Lacoste shirt for a ho drum Disney one with holes in it (yes i over use shirts i love), re-work a playlist, update the i-pod, buy a bottle of water....and start heading to the gymnasium!!! Dum dum dummmm...

You know you are drinking a lot of H2O when...

...you subconsciously run to the bathroom at 5 in the morning!!

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Back where I need to be

Yes folks it's about that time again...the Fall.

While designers are churning out their designs on the catwalks of Paris, I sit in my dorm room trying to churn my engines in the right direction!

This has been a tough year, one I like to call: unsuccessful.

But it's all about to change and I'll tell you (and especially myself) WHY?

1. This (being fat and lazy) has made me the saddest I've ever been. And there's been some eff'ed up shit in my life but it's never made me this unhappy. So now I KNOW it's time for change.

2. Mom is investing in me. The way I see it is that the cash she is forking over to the gym, the diet and whatever else will help me make it work, is going to then (hopefully) roll over to shopping $$!!! So it's a long road to the win-win scenario but I'm willing to drive.

I just really need to do this. Last year was a sham. It's the real deal this time!!

Road to Louis '10 starts now!

or maybe Hermes?? I'm kind of fond of the scarves :p

This Is Bad, Real Bad MJ

I've been gone for a while. The reason? No surprise here, a weight gain and my lame attempt to ignore what was clearly within my hands to control!

Re-cap: July was spent pigging out and refusing to move. All my gym planning in June just didn't happen. I felt like a fat stupid walrus.

August: Went on vay-cay to Greece. Started moving around, swimming, biking (once, more on this later), and stuff. But it wasn't till I got to Athens that I started feeling the results!
* I caught myself off guard in the mirror the other day! My neck is starting to come into view! yay! Take that double chin!
* Clothes are a little looser and I'm feeling more energetic.
* I've been eating breakfast too! That's rare!
* Discovered my love for Greek yogurt! (tzatziki and yogurt w/ honey are my new love affairs :p)

Let's hope Ramadan is a good month for me both spiritually and food-wise! :) Here's to a smart futoor! No gaymat! :p

Ramadan Kareem!

I heart marshmallows!

Been Munching on this all day <3>

...and the livin' is easy

Well, it's already the 10th of JUNE!!
I LOVE June! but my goodness this year! it just seems to fly by!!
June is all about being home, doing nothing til 4am then sleeping a nice sound sleep.
Waking to the afternoon sun then heading to the pool or just chilling with the girls...
But this year it's different...
I decided to rejoin the academic institutions of the world and they are keeping me hostage til the 19th!!

So until then I've just been a lazy bum! I didn't go to a single course this week!!
I'm suffering from a serious case of lethargy! At the base is a prolonged state of ennui directly caused by the never ending academic year! Our class skipping antics have even led us to the nearest Starbucks shamelessly playing our Nintendo DS's like elementary kids! :-P (their carrot cake has been named "Perfection")

Foodwise: I've been eating whatever I want! WRONG I know!

But I am happy to report a 1.2 kg. loss, which proves my theory; DO NOT pressure me

and I'll do it on my own!!

I am also very very happy to report that the Harvey-meter (as in Harvey Nichols) is in full working order, and the needle has moved an inch in the right direction!! Yes ladies, I have finally purchased clothing from the London based department store!!

A lovely two piece Manoush dress! :-D

As the Girshwin's say; "Summertime...and the livin' is easy!"

Here's to a fat-gaining-free summer!!! 

Fingers X-ed!!!

Not diet related but...

  MANCHESTER LOST!!!!!!!  2-0!!!

  this brings joy to my cold cold heart!!

 C'mon Rafa bring home the bacon!! (or beef (halal version) :p!)

 :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:DD:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

   Annoying muthee3 on ART sport 4: (adnan hamad)

  - manshester la shay2! manshester la shay2!

  -min huwa gadik ya Guardiola??!!

  - al '3azal il asmar (his fav nick for T.Henry)

  - 3ain 3ala al yameen wa 3ain 3ala el yasar!

   and my personal fav comment of the night:

 

  - lam ta3ud 7amy al deyar ya Edwin van der Saar!!

  you may call me a sadist; but revenge is sweet! 

  Here's to the Gunners!!! xoxo!

   

That Temptress: Saralee

The crime scene...

                       

Victim: 

a sad 1/6th slice of Saralee chocolate pound cake

Criminal:

Moi...

Crime:

Unlawful entry with intent

Theft...(it wasn't my leftovers)

Weapon of choice:

A fork...found @ the scene of the crime.

  DAMN THAT TEMPTRESS who goes by the name of SARALEE!!!!!

 And it wasn't even that good! I really could've waited for better cakes to come around like something from Cafe Lilou or Coldstone brownies even!! But I had to silence that craving with something containing cocoa and that was the only thing available! 

 BUT I walked to the mall instead of taking the car (mainly cuz i had no choice; my little baby is in the garage). I should get a few points for that right? Oh and I had dinner @ Dome. I didn't order their diviiiiine burger this time, nope, it's grilled prawns for me! And they didn't disappoint! :)

Where is this motivation coming from?

No seriously!! Where is this motivation coming from??

I just spent 2 hours and a half at the gym!!! Voluntarily might I add. >:P

This is what my workout consisted of; (in order)

50 minutes walking on an incline 400 cals 4 km

15 minutes abs 30-ish

10 minutes rowing 70 cals

50 minutes biking 209 cals 10 km

Total = 709 cals!!! 14 km!!

BRING ON THE BIG MACS!!!!!! No I'm kidding I'm kidding!! :p

But I think I can pinpoint the exact moment where a sudden burst of determination came over me!
It was right after the 50 minute walk on the treadmill. I had just stepped down when this guy I usually see at the gym (a friend of a friend) stopped for a little chat. Let's call him Mr. Feel Good, cuz I always feel good after talking to him.
He's not a crush or anything; he's just someone who takes the time to tell me I looked better than before and to tell me stories of when he was fat once upon a time. Makes a difference, that's all I'm saying. Plus, it doesn't hurt that he is easy on the eyes :p

That was the good news....The bad news is I came home to a nice dinner from Lebanese Flower (Zahrat Lebnan). And this is where I eat all those calories back. 2 shawarmas, 2 warak enabs, and a couple-a tablespoons of tabouleh! But considering that I only had Strawberry juice and a side of corn all day, I didn't do much damage. Except with the horrible timing which is 2 hours before bed!! And the horrible eating habits starting with the fact that I don't eat breakfast on a regular basis. OK FIIIINE! I had two mini pizzas and a galaxy in the cafeteria!! UGH! Down with honesty!!!

I don't think Mr.Feel Good would like that too much. Oh well...and so the guilt trip begins...yipee.

Lackadaisical

I really forgot why I'm doing this.

HELLOOOO!!!! FASHION!!!!!!!

But I honestly don't think that's working anymore. The Harvey-Meter is broken!

What's the Harvey-Meter you say?

Oh its the scale by which I measure my success or failure in the realm of body image.
And almost every time I fail miserably! Always ending up in the Beauty or Shoe sections...alas..
It started not to matter anymore!! And I CANT have that! That's why I'm back here writing because I don't
want to sink further in this hole that I've created.

Btw I'm supposed to be at the GYM right now. I have my pants on and everything...except I'm still in my flip flops :s

"OK OK FIiiiiiiiiiiNE! I'm Going I'm going!! Jeeeeeez!!!" Says the Voice in my head to the other one that spurs it on!

the other one is mean i tell you...

Ferngully

  Yes, Ferngully!

      That cartoon from my childhood. Just stayed up all night waiting for it to load and watched it all on youtube! Ahh nostalgia...Next up...Rock-a-Doodle!

I forgot these cartoon movies that we're not produced by Disney in the early nineties! They're actually pretty darn entertaining. Btw: Robin Williams is in it as Batty. And the villain Hexxus, is just darn creepy and gross!! Sad message though, I can't believe we're destroying the rainforests!! 

   Really need to sleep. This was just another excuse to snack. I forget the guilt right after snacking after midnight. Not worth it. :s Even if Cadbury Clusters tempt me again, I shan't participate in this nocturnal malnourishment! 

Un marichère sans lard; s.v.p!

   Crêperie Josselin, my oh my!

  I couldn't believe it took me 7 months to find this hidden gem right down my street in Paris!

Well it was on the insistence of my food buddy that we go there, and then I was just as hooked as she was! 

This is our usual order:

- Un marichère sans lard; (spinach, cream, and cheese...simple combo, BIG on taste)

- a diet Coke for me and a carafe d'eau for her;

- Finishing off with 2 nutella crêpes or if i feel like it; caramel au beurre salé!

There were many things I did not consume before Paris, but something about the way the 

food is prepared there, gosh, well it's just amazing what you wouldn't eat!! (fois gras, still and forever)

Fried egg was one of my BIG no-no's, just like fish and tomato, but I credit the marichere for

helping me get over that! When my buddy told me to poke the yoke (yes, i did) and spread the

goo on the crispy outer edge of the crepe I thought, "ew!"

"Just do it!", she said

And so I complied.

Needless to say, by the time I reached the end, the slightly burned smokiness of the edge of a

real Brittany crêpe with the saltiness of the yoke was; divine!

The actual crêpe is a fattening masterpiece of cream and cheese. The spinach is the only

"healthy" thing about it! :p

What kept us going to Josselin at least three times a week, was not just the crêpes...

It's a family business; the mom greets us like her kids, and her son (the owner) is half italian

and we all had a little crush on him! LOL

This is my favourite crêperie in Paris, and many other's as well, if you aren't on time

a que forms outside! I miss Josselin!!

67, rue de Montparnasse Paris 75014 France

The Devil

I don't think it shows, but these jars are bigger than my hands!

Found @ le bon marché

Absent

Still on vacation...

Eating reasonably...

oh well...who really knows.. :p

Broccoli is NOT boring anymore!!

   

       I'm back in the kitchen cooking my meals and I must say it feels goood! I honestly forgot the rush I feel when I hear onions sizzling in the pan, smell the spices emanating from the pot, or best of all baked chocolate anything from the oven! All the preparing, chopping, washing, combining, mixing, stirring, seasoning, is just such a part of who I am that I'm beginning to feel whole again. 

     Preparing my meals means I really want to take care of myself, cuz let's face it, at this age, who is gonna??!

    So I finally made the "classic" Ottolenghi* recipe I've been meaning to make. 

  Simply, it's Chargrilled Broccoli with Chilli and Garlic. They say: "Customers come especially for it and always complain that their broccoli is never as exciting as ours. In all honesty, broccoli is a boring vegetable and you do need a magic touch to bring it to life." 

      So without further ado, I present to you...my dinner!

   2 heads of broccoli (abt 500g)

   115 ml of olive oil 

   4 garlic cloves thinly sliced

   2 mild red chillis thinly sliced

   toasted flaked almonds or very thin slices of lemon (with skin), to garnish (optional)

  Separate broccoli into florets aka. tear them apart into mini trees. Prepare lage sauce pan w/ water to boil broccoli. Throw them in and blanch for 2 minutes no more. Take out and place in ice cold water to stop the cooking. Drain and allow to dry completely. Toss broccoli with 45 ml olive oil and season generously with salt and pepper. 

  Get a ridged grill pan and place it on high heat. Grill dem broccoli! Turn 'em around too.

 While grilling, get a small saucepan fill it up with the rest of the olive oil and cook the garlic and chilli on medium heat. Do not burn them! Just get the garlic to a golden brown then you're good. Remember they still cook after you take 'em off the heat!

  Pour the oil, garlic, and chilli over the broccoli and toss together well. Garnish w/ lemons or almonds. Gorgeous stuff!

 True story: One of my roommates hates garlic. She ate it all till the last broccoli floret and she didn't know there was any garlic despite the fact that it's in the recipe' title!! All the flavors mix marvelously in a subtle way, trust me or trust Ottolenghi. He rocks!

* Ottolenghi The Cookbook, Ebury Press, 2008. 

Thai Chicken w/ Chillies

   So I started planning my meals. No more excuses like, "Oh I have no time to cook" or "The kitchen is too small." 

   I was actually inspired by Jamie Oliver as I was running on the Crosstrainer weeks before. Yeah I watch the food channel as I work out :p

Here's what I prepared:

    Thai Chicken w/ Chillies 

    there's no precise measurements cuz that's just how I work...

  but it's 2 chillies that's for sure...any more and you'll sweat! take the seeds out too cuz those are the real criminals! he cooks in aluminum foil pockets which is a genius idea!

    so its: 

 

    2 chicken breasts skinless (one for me and one for Hasoos)

    ginger

    onions

    garlic

    chili

    paprika

    salt

    pepper

    soy sauce

    lime leaves

      Mix the marinade. Coat chicken. Make a pocket in aluminum foil. Put chicken and marinade in. Close firmly. Leave in fridge. Go to gym. Come back from gym. Set oven to 180 celsius. Place chicken package in oven for 25-30 minutes. Take a shower. Smell the yummy food. Go to kitchen. Take it out. Cut open with knife. Enjoy the wonderful gingery aroma. Eat. :)

 and that's all there was to it!!

Writing Post-Mortem

  

   Yes, the worst has happened.

  I *gulps* gained two lousy, filthy, degrading kilograms!!

  This is unbelievably retarded. I have changed my eating habits, gone to the gym at least 5 times a week, and considerably reduced my chocolate intake!! How did this happen??!!

   I seriously was at a loss for words last night when my trainers were giving me "the talk". All I wanted to do was cry, but instead I had to listen to their advice when I have heard it 20 different ways before. After they we're done I went to the locker room, sat down and tried to think. 

 Cue: my female trainer Samia (yep, I couldn't escape) followed by my friends (who paused their workouts, bless their hearts). Their concern just made me burst into tears. I haven't cried like that in a long time. "The Cry of Agony". I was really really disappointed to say the least! But I believe Aunt Flo (ie. time o' da month) had something to do with this... 

   ps. the link is a really disturbing video, albeit funny...

  I also felt like the last thing I wanted to do was workout. But I'm not like that. 

I cried my last tear and heaved my last sigh.  

I washed my face clean and patted it dry.

  That was an unintentional poetic verse, so I decided to upgrade it to italic status. I digress.

  Where was I? Oh yes, I spritzed my face with Deepsea Rose Water from Japan cuz I need Shu Uemura's reassurance during times like these; and I walked out that door onto the battle field. This is war: with Guns and Roses. 

    Captain Jet put me on a different program cuz apparently I'm not a cardio type of person ( coulda mentioned that before I did 10 km on the Crosstrainer!) Instead I'll be doing low-intensity but longer time blah blah, I couldn't focus on what he said I was strung out. But basically no more huff and puff for me.

 

     To calm me down, I chose the "Disney" playlist on my iPod. Yeah, cuz I'm a kid like that! I started out with the Main Street Electrical Parade to get me marching. Then as he increased the incline and speed I was transported to EPCOT, listening to the Illuminations soundtrack. After 45 minutes of sing-along songs I decided to leave as I couldn't stay anymore; also escaping the shame of aerobics. 

   I tried calling my BFF in England and I let it all out again. It was sad. I won't include details but mainly I said, " I'm tired of being this!" and "God, I never thought I'd be the girl crying on the side of the street!" Yeah, it was that pathetic. 

    Then I decided to plan my meals, because I wasn't utilizing all of my resources, namely my Cuisine Diplome. I can cook. I can cook tasty low-cal meals, and I just wasn't. Which sucks btw. 

So I head to the supermarché and pick up a wide variety of fruits and veggies, lean meat, and the new Shape magazine which features "Elaine" from Seinfeld on the cover. She's 48 and looks waaay hot! I took a moment to mentally spit on myself. 

    I knew this wouldn't be easy, but I didn't expect a blow like this from the start!

 I'm not gonna lie and be all, "Oh I'm more motivated than ever now!" Spare me. This effing sucks! But I still am determined, a little bit less, but I haven't lost momentum yet. 

Images: shape.com; makeupbag.net

The Day of Reckoning

It has finally arrived...the weigh in.

Tomorrow, my compatriots and I will step on a scale that will display a number that would determine whether I live or perish!! Ok no, not really. But it is indeed the weigh in. We're not supposed to eat or drink ANYthing for 2 hours prior to the gym; which is where the "scale of doom" awaits...

   It is not your average scale. No, sir. This device prompts you to stand shoulder width apart, clutching what seems to be two Nintendo Wii-like baton's and remaining perfectly and utterly still while judgemental beeps are emitted from that confounded contraption. 

  They start out slow, and then gain momentum... till they finally stop. And all the while it's like they're saying, "You" *beep* "big" *beep* "fat" *beep* "tub" *beep* "of" *beep* "LARD!" *beep beep beep beep*.

Those few seconds feel like an eternity!

   Then...a paper is printed. Yes, the shame! It's on the record! Everything! Your...weight. Your...fat count. Some other fancy calculations like, Skeletal Muscle Mass, Body Balance, Upper body to Lower body proportion, tout! And as if that's not all, it even gives you a chart mapping out your life pattern. It goes, Normal, Alert, Risky..and God forbid, Very Risky.

   When I started, I was at Risky. That's a darn shame cuz I'm only 21. That means that if I continue with my lifestyle, (hello epicure of the world!) and without exercise (sloth to end all slothfulness), I'll be a (big, horrendous, dumb, inconsiderate) fool!

   So I hope that I live though tomorrow to write a more concise update on my gymnastic endeavor. 

Bad Girl

 Ok so here's what happened between November and now:

 - Took a break in December and went to LA (read: ate whatever I want.)

I gained about 7 or 8 kgs. I don't know exactly cuz I didn't want to know. 

On top of all that...I bought the wallet that I wanted!! 

I KNOWWW!!! I'm BAAAAAD!!! 

I deserve to be flogged by the Stairmaster !! Every ache and pain from the Crosstrainer is mine to feel. Every drop of sweat from jogging on the Treadmill is a salvation from my past sins. Damn you In-n-Out burger!!!

-Sat on my ass during January and mid-February. 

- On February 24th I joined the gym. 

- Feb. 25 was reminded of life goal #36...Run the Walt Disney World Marathon!!

Funny story: Saw a girl @ the mall (in AD!!) wearing a t-shirt from the 2008 Marathon. I had to ask her what it was like. She said she trained for a year!! So I set a date...Jan 2013! I promised myself

  So it's March 8th 2009..."i should have lost it by now" still echoes in my head! Thanks S. But I'm motivated again. That's why I'm on here. Yes, I have been avoiding you Oh, page of mine. 

I just remembered the joy I felt after a good workout. It does rival a Red Velvet from Sprinkles in LA, but I'm not in LA. And if it gives me the same satisfaction, then I guess I'll workout here. 

And plus, I just discovered Nike makes some of the cutest workout outfits!! If that's not a great motivation then I don't know what is!!